BREAKING NEWS: 2-22-10

On a recent trip to work out the final moves of the Gunx classic “The Andrew Zalewski Traverse,” I came upon this. It seems as if there is an epidemic around the world right now of “famous” and “classic” and “bad ass” lines that have been broken or damaged. Recently damaged ultra famous boulder problems are as follows but not limited to: The Andrew Zalewski Traverse, The Beautiful and the Damned, Dreamtime, Fatman, Karma, The Mandala, and Witness the Fitness.

Details are slim, but it appears that the perpetrator of these events, our assailant as it was, has been eating too many blonde oreos in an attempt to “train” and has been destroying national bouldering treasures left and right. In his pursuit of bouldering fame and glory, he has been seen traveling with a rebuttal sign to counter responses that he has broken these problems. One source, who requested to remain anonymous, captured this picture of the vandal at a bar.

If you see this man, who is roughly 6’7″ and 260, please refrain from confronting him. He is armed and dangerous and is reportedly carrying around “huge guns” and “mad skillz.” If you do see this man, please send an email to news@bassforyourface.com.

While the future of “The Andrew Zalewski Traverse” is unknown, future rising stars have reclaimed other vandalized problems. Recently Adam Ondra has repeated Dreamtime and we can only hope he will come to re-climb this timeless classic. Only time will tell.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, February 23rd, 2010 at 8:45 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.